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Thursday, May 16, 2013

"They Actually Eat That:" Sweet Sue's Canned Whole Chicken.

Along with apparently having fetishes for everything, humans will also put anything into a can. The idea of having food last almost forever is very tempting. However, there are some instances when the question is not can you, but should you, can this thing? This is one of the things that you should not can:




This is Sweet Sue canned whole chicken. As in, somebody took a chicken, stuffed it into a can, and pretended that it was done by somebody named Sue. I don't even know where they sell these. The 6th Ring of Hell is a fair enough guess. It seems to be a food made for foodies to try once, blog about, then promptly call disgusting.

Why do I say this? Because:




Sweet Sue, by which I mean Satan, does not lie and knows how to label hellish edibles. It's literally as if they stuffed a (small) chicken into a can. Not everything stays in tact, but there is undeniably a whole chicken in there. It also looks like it rose from the chickeny grave, only to die again, but nobody would ever be so desperate as to attempt chicken necromancy. At least it isn't false advertising.

So, how does it taste? In a word, bad. According to this blogger, it has a metallic taste, even after being cooked, along with being roughly like chicken soup in flavor. I will not touch this can, and if I do, I'm taking it to an exorcist. Or the Ghostbusters, whoever wants to deal with canned zombie chicken.

Morbid curiosity says that somebody, somewhere finds this appetizing. Alas, I do not know where these people are.  The rest of the world finds it the single strangest canned food in existence. Homestyle goodness indeed.


2 comments:

  1. Reminds me of that horrid canned pork my mom got in hurricane relief supplies back in 1986 when Hurricane Elena hit. Gross.. Even the dogs wouldn't eat it.

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  2. Relax and grow up to an adult. This is real food. Natural healthy food. I'd rather eat this chicken than smoke pot or take other unhealthy drugs. You have your life priorities backwards..LOL And for best taste, you roast this in an oven first. Never knew how many children are living in adult bodies??? Seems like many...

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