OMG SHINY! - Moldavite

 
A GRRRRAAAIILL?! 

We end a week of shiny things with the Holy Grail of all rocks. No, seriously; before the Holy Grail was ever considered a cup, the Druids were using that term to describe a very unusual rock that may or may not have been magic. All they knew was that moldavite came from outer space and that it was therefore awesome.

Yes, moldavite, the green stone up there, has similar pockmarks as meteorites. It was first classified as an igneous rock (i.e. a rock made by volcanic activity), but this was later proven false. Moldavite is now definitely considered a tektite - a glassy rock formed by the impact of a meteor upon the Earth's surface.

Most moldavite can be traced to one meteorite that crashed 15 million years ago in western Bavaria, an event that created a giant-ass hole called the "Nördlinger Ries" in Bavaria, Germany. Moldavite from this event can be found in Bavaria, other parts of Germany, the Czech Republic, Austria, and, true to its name, the Republic of Moldova. Hardcore moldavite fanatics will tell you that, if it is NOT from Europe, it is probably a fake.

That last paragraph is all that science knows for sure. From then on, one has to look into New Age crackpot websites about moldavite's magical properties. Nearly every page will mention that it is, somehow, linked to the Christian Holy Grail, in part because it is the only green stone to ever fall from the sky. They are not the only ones to think that this weird space rock is something special; as stated earlier, the Druids thought it was cool, too.

As with various animal parts in Chinese medicine, moldavite is almost a panacea, except that it works more on the soul than on the body. Many people describe feeling a "vibe" when holding moldavite, regardless of how much they believe in the supernatural. Due to moldavite's rarity and mystical properties, even small 'flowers' of moldavite range into the hundreds of USD.

Or maybe you will just have to know the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow to get your hands on some real moldavite. We do not know anything about swallows carrying coconuts, either, so if anybody asks, we're listening to Lady Gaga and our telephone's kinda busy.

Tomorrow: A drug that can turn humans into zombies?! We'll see about that...