Killer Cute: Hooded Pitohui.

Ah, spring is in the air! Flowers are blooming, the air is warm, and songbirds fill the air with music. What could possibly be more representative of spring than a brightly-colored songbird?

...a brightly-colored, poisonous songbird?!

This colorful little bird is a hooded pitohui (Pitohui dichorus). It is native to all places called "New Guinea," and quite common there. Both females and males have bright colors, so it's not like we can tell if that's a dude or a chick. Yes, that pun was intended; it's Easter.

And, yes, the songbird is poisonous. The hooded pitohui was one of the first documented poisonous birds, and is frequently touted as the most poisonous.

How does a songbird become poisonous? By eating lots and lots of poisonous beetles. The process is called bioaccumulation, and is roughly the same method by which DDT accumulated in various bird species during the 60's - only, well, more beneficial. It's virtually the same way that lorises and monarch butterflies become toxic.

This bird is going to KILL you.

The resulting poison works like a charm. It is a neurotoxin called homobatrachotoxin, and can be found in most places in or on the bird's body. Merely touching this bird causes tingling and numbness (nerve tampering). Imagine what eating this bird could do. No wonder they're labelled as "least concern."

Need more of a trip? These beetles are related to the same bugs that poison dart frogs (i.e. the little froggies so lethal that natives dip arrows in their poison) eat. The pitohui is a bird who thinks it's a poison dart frog. You thought you knew songbirds? Don't trust those bright colors. They might not be for mating.

Creature Feature: Red-Winged Blackbird.

So yeah. Yesterday consisted of 75 miles of country road, Gatorade, water, and lots and lots of bikes. I'm still a bit tired and sunburned from that, but regular updates to this blog will resume starting now.

That's a Red-winged blackbird (Agelaius phoeniceus), which I saw in abundance in 75 miles' worth of farmland. (No,that is not my pic.)  The RWB ranges from Alaska to Guatemala, covering all of the U.S. down to Mexico. It is an omnivore, eating insects and seeds. Far from being on the endangered list, it is probably the most common and well-documented bird in North America.If you live in North America, you've probably already seen it. There are several subspecies, so your local blackbird may not match the pic above.

Just because the RWB is common doesn't mean it's not neat. The female and male Red-winged blackbird look absolutely nothing alike. The female almost looks like a very large sparrow - very brown with dark brown markings - in sharp contrast with the male's striking colors. One would not even think they were the same species at first glance. Point is, if you see a black bird with red shoulders, 1) it's probably a RWB, 2. it's a male for sure. Some just look brighter than others.

Let's talk about those cool feathers for a bit. The rings of red and yellow are properly called "epaulets" and vary in the amount of red and/or yellow with the subspecies. I'm thinking this little blackbird has monster potential- maybe as a Fire/Flying Pokemon with insane sexual dimorphism, but more likely a mechanical sunbird that either has the discs on fire or uses them as a frame for mechanical feathers. It's already got phoeniceus in the species name- perfect fodder is perfect.

Like most birds, RWB's also sing. Instead of being melodious, however, it sounds like a machine trying to make music. I can't picture an instrument playing its song. I really don't even know how to describe it, so please turn to the YT video below for a soundbyte. It's a very distinct call that, knowing birds, probably varies heavily with region and/or function.




Does being common stop birds like this from being cool? Nope! That song makes me turn my head any time I hear it. Plus, cardinals are cute, but a bit overrated; why aren't more states using this bird to show off? (I'm seriously tired. Really. This entry barely became a thing.)

"They Actually Eat That:" Larks.

Ah, spring. OK, it's going into summer, but the weather is warm, the air is fresh, and the birds are still singing. Red-winged blackbirds usually greet me on my bike rides, but Europe has another bird with a much more beautiful song...that just so happens to be a delicacy.

Can you identify a lark bird from a long way away?

For those of you who are not disgusted enough by a songbird appearing in this column, that is a lark. Yes, larks are probably the most widely-eaten songbird in existence. Nearly every culture in Europe has some record of eating larks, from the Romans to the British. Lark tongues were always seen as particularly valuable (perhaps because the birds sing well). It's not like the rest of the bird was wasted, though; oh, far from it.

The traditional way to eat a lark is to eat it whole - bones and all. I would advise de-feathering and cooking it first. If this sounds familiar, look up "ortolan." Just think of the larks as mini-chickens once you're past the "oh my gods, I'm eating a cute little birdie!" stage and bite after they've been out of the oven for a bit.  Or you could always put them in pies.

This is a pigeon pie. The recipe is basically the same.

Lark pie is one of those very, very old-fashioned dishes that people love to collect recipes for. The idea is the same as any given meat pie, so if you know how to make that, good for you. If not, there are plenty of recipes. Depending on what recipe you pick, you may be asked to hunt down anywhere from nine to three dozen larks. Also, if you like, put a bit of liver forcemeat in the larks - as if handling dead larks was not mortifying enough.

Also, "lark's tongue in aspic"is a legend - even I'm not sure if this one is real or not. Somebody attempted to make it using oyster as a substitute for rare lark meat. It would not surprise me if, in the days when larks were plentiful, someone had indeed made lark's tongue in aspic. This would involve a lot of larks to pull tongues out of, however, and that's darn near impossible to do today.

It's a little hard to find lark today if you want to try it. We have so much meat now that we have little need to eat songbirds. Larks themselves are also becoming rare due to habitat loss. There are, however, still a few markets and restaurants in Italy (and Southern Europe) that make lark dishes. Good luck finding them; it felt like Google was trolling me while attempting research for this entry. Lark Creek Steakhouse does not serve lark, unfortunately.

Creature Feature: Andean Cock-of-the-Rock.

When it comes to names, birds really get the short end of the stick. Even if you are not related to chickens, if you happen to be a brightly-colored male bird, you may get called a cock. This will cause teenagers with dirty minds to snicker at you, and your name will be censored on internet forums. Tough cookies; the tits and boobies of the world share your pain.



The Andean Cock-of-the-rock (Rupicola peruviana) is one of the few passerines (songbirds) to be compared to a rooster. It lives in the Andean cloud forests of South America. Cocks and hens of the rock are rather shy birds, so whatever data we have of them must have been taken by quiet, patient people. It is also the national bird of Peru.

As usual, the male is the looker of the two sexes. He has a bright red-orange comb and a piercing yellow eye that makes the ladies go wild. Some women we know might go crazy for a disk of orange feathers, too. Point is, this guy is one of the flashier songbirds out there...and how.



Andean cocks are also among the few types of animals to have a mating pattern called a "lek." The males all gather in one area to strut their stuff. The males then fight each other, and, as the female approaches, 'fight' for show. The fight escalates into a brightly-colored cacophony until the female finally picks a mate. Even then, she will not be the only one giving him eggs; like many birds, CotRs are polygamous, and do not tend to the young at all.

Even if it is not quite a rooster, the Andean Cock-of-the-rock does have a fair amount in common with them. The crest and the sheer amount of noise they make when in a lek are probably good indicators of how it got its name. Should one wish for a name without censoring, try "Gallito de Roca" - we're pretty sure the internet censorship rules haven't caught on to Spanish, yet.

Creature Feature: Stephens Island Wren.

One of the cries against exotic pets is, frequently, that they will become invasive species. The biggest, baddest anti-reptile bill recently was HR669, a bill that forbade ownership of any animal that was not a cat, dog, fish, or farm animal. This bill was, of course, shut down by herpers and ferret lovers alike. It does not make sense to make an "environmentally-conscious" bill while leaving off swine, cows, and cats and dogs. The most domesticated animals are often the most damaging to a local ecology. Let's not even get into humans as an invasive species.

Mind, the origin of this bill was a lady in Guam. Guam is an island that is technically U.S. territory,  but not quite Illuminati enough to make it into the United States. Island ecologies tend to be a zero-sum game when it comes to animals, exotic or otherwise, living on the island. Either the invading fauna kicks the island's ass or everything on said island is out to kill you. Yes, koalas, we know you have extremely sharp claws.

Australia's smaller cousin New Zealand was not as lucky when it came to tolerating human settlers (it took Hobbits much better). Australia had vicious predators with teeth that would make humans piss themselves, spiders that would kill you in your sleep, and kangaroos that, though herbivores, could definitely beat you at kickboxing if challenged. (That last one would be your own fault. Apologies to anyone drunk enough to try that.)

New Zealand had...birds. Very strange birds.



If it were still alive, we would ask you to meet the Stephens Island Wren. It was not really a wren, more like a member of an extinct group of flightless songbirds. Only in New Zealand would that EVER work. All of New Zealand's ecology was based on birds.

Then an unknown Western ship came over with a cat on it. Do I really need to say more?

This without the cage, for those of you without imagination.

 

The Stephens Island Wren is a legend among animals going extinct. Word has it that the cat of a lighthouse owner single-handedly wiped out every "wren" on the island. The owner's assistant, David Lyall, brought the strange looking bird to the scientific community's attention after seeing what the cat (nicknamed "Tibbles") was doing. It was too late; the wren was down to the last few members of its species. The species had probably gone extinct in the winter of 1895.

This is very unlikely. The far more plausible causes for the "wren"'s extinction were being eaten by the Maori as unfried KFC and the introduction of a pregnant cat on board an unknown ship. By the time "Tibbles" emerged, there would have been several feral cats already around the island, picking off lesser birds like people at a buffet.  There are no "exotic" pets to blame here - just humans, cats, and several very lazy birds.



And if you don't think dogs can be damaging? Dingoes. Just...dingoes.

Creature Feature: Bowerbird.

What really separates man from the animals? Some would say an awesome brain-to-body-ratio and very versatile, articulate digits; others would theorize less physical things like love, imagination, and art.

We could debate about love and imagination in the animal kingdom, but birds definitely invented art first. People likely invented music after hearing bird songs (which have cool tweaks of their own, such as dialects). Some birds, like humans, can see in color; this is best shown in the colorful plumage of parrots and the iridescent plumage of some other birds. There is at least one type of bird that uses modern art to win a mate.


(I've seen worse things called "art.")

Bowerbirds are medium-sized perching birds (passerines) in the family Ptilonorhynicidae. They are native to Australia and New Guinea and are thought to be related to either birds-of-paradise or lyrebirds. Bowerbirds cover twenty species in eight genera, but they all have one thing in common: They're into pop art in a big way.

And I shall call it..."CLOTHESPINS IN STICKS!"

When mating season arrives, the male creates a two-walled structure out of twigs called a "bower." This bower starts simple, but quickly becomes more elaborate as items are added to it. Some keep the two-walled structure and add all sorts of junk; others add berries and make what must be a summer beach house to a songbird.

What sorts of items are stolen for this structure depends on the bowerbird; for example, female Satin Bowerbirds (Ptilonorhynchus violaceus) have evolved to like the color blue. Why? Who knows, but it results in a looot of blue things getting stolen in this video. This guy even opens someone else's car!




The female then chooses the male with the prettiest bower and/or flashiest plumage. Like lyrebirds,  bowerbirds are also excellent mimics, This is like walking into an art gallery, then making out with whomever made the prettiest painting. Naturally, this mating rite attracts more than one female to a single artistic male. Hey, a lot of human women would go with the bird that opened a car.


He also has the most gorgeous eyes I've ever seen on a bird. Look at that PURPLE!

Wouldn't it be great if human artists got that sort of treatment?

Creature Feature: Lyrebird.

"All bird entries are the same, blah blah blah." Yes, many of the bird entries I write simply consist of "the male looks awesome, the female sucks." Although this is also true for this entry, there is a little bit more icing to look forward to on his cake.

The superb lyrebird (Menura novaehollandiae) looks almost like a smaller, less colorful peacock. It is native to the forests of Australia (no spread to Indonesia this time). Being one of Australia's most recognizable native birds, it (OK, specifically the male) has been featured on money.



As the world's third largest and heaviest songbird, it is about the size and weight of a pheasant. (There is subtle difference between this bird's tail and a peacock's: a peacock's stunning feathers are on his back, supported by tailfeathers.) The male of the species has a pheasant-y tail to match his pheasant-y size:

 

For those of you who have no clue how the lyrebird got its name, a lyre is a sort of hand-held harp common in ancient Greek art. It resembles this bird's tail very well, but before you start forming conspiracy theories, the Greeks had no idea this Australian bird existed.

This bird is also one of the most amazing mimics I have ever heard:


The bird world has some very good mimics. Rarely are such talents displayed rapid-fire as they are here. The lyrebird copies the most complex sounds he can muster and sings in competition with other lyrebirds. This bird imitates a kookabura, a camera, a siren, and chainsaws just to get his mate.

Hell, y'know what? I'd mate with that bird in a heartbeat; he's just too awesome for anything less.

Creature Feature: Butcherbirds.

Awww, isn't that the cutest little songbird that you've ever seen? It's a loggerhead shrike (Lanius ludovicianus). Instead of being flashy or having a pretty voice, the shrike attracts his mates with presents that he's hoarded.

These "presents" include dead animals that have been skewered on thorns, barbed wire, or anything else pointed. Their prey ranges from insects (including the lubber grasshopper, whose poison deteriorates after baking) to lizards, all skewered and waiting to be eaten. The genus of shrikes is, after all, called Lanius - Latin for "butcher." Check out how they hunt in Israel...and the end result!


They also like shiny things, but who cares?

Shrikes are not the only birds to utilize this technique. The real butcherbirds are the members of Cracticus, which resemble Australian magpies. Even its scientific name sounds, well..cracked. Look up any member of the genus and you find stuff like this:



These butcherbirds are native to Australia and Asia, which of course led to at least one pop culture reference:


From Devil Lady episode 15. Since the show is not only Japanese but also refers to crows, it is DEFINITELY talking about the Cracticus butcherbirds.

What? Nobody would ever do that for real because it is so darn twisted? Think again. Vlad the Impaler, a Romanian prince, was known for torturing people by leaving them to die on stakes. Most of you probably know about him via Bram Stoker's Dracula - the price's real last name.


He must have been a shrike in a past life, not a bat.

Creature Feature: Common Grackle.

If you live in North America, you probably have not even noticed these birds. From a distance, grackles look like regular, unappealing blackbirds. Sure, their neon yellow eyes stand out, but eh. Black birds with yellow eyes. So what?

Even their names are unappealing. "Grackle" is not a pretty word at all. Grackles do not have pretty songs like some other passerines. The distaste for this bird can be most clearly expressed by the word for a group of grackles: A 'plague.'

One look up close reveals that they are not normal blackbirds. They aren't really black! Like little hidden peacocks, their feathers shine with shades of iridescent blue, purple, and green. Males are a lot brighter than females, enough so that the females are sometimes mistaken for a different species of bird.

They are also noticeably intelligent, and sport a number of interesting behaviors. For example, common grackles practice 'anting'- they allow ants to clean their feathers. They can also mimic other birds or sounds, albeit not as efficiently as mockingbirds. As demonstrated in the video below, grackles can also learn a few tricks:

Believe me when I say that dog food is more appropriate for birds than for dogs.

(Also, hooray for my first North American creature?)